The Best Bike Jokes on The Internet!
Have you heard any wheelie good bicycling jokes lately? Riding a bike is an excellent hobby by itself. It promotes good health both mental and physical.
Besides increasing stamina and building muscles, it's also a great form of transportation. For others, it's a convenient way to snap out of the WFH-induced sedentary lifestyle. And there's always something going on with a cyclist. Either you get inspired by their sense of adventure or their humour.
This is where our team has discovered that a cyclist's happiness isn't always on the road. Often, it comes from their fellow bikers' puns. So here's our list (in no particular order) of the best cycling jokes of all time!
Guess the Answer
Q: Why can't a bicycle stand up on its own?
A: Because it's two-tired!
Q: Why are bank tellers not allowed to ride bicycles?
A: They tend to lose their balance.
Q: What does a bicycle call its dad?
Q: How did the barber win the bike race?
A: He took a shortcut.
Q: When is a bike not a bicycle?
A: When it turns into a driveway.
Q: What's the difference between a well-dressed man on a bicycle and a poorly dressed man on a unicycle?
A: Attire (a tyre - gettit?).
Q: What do you call two hippos riding a bicycle?
Q: Did you hear about the environmentalist who went down the same bicycle route twice?
A: He re-cycled.
Q: What do you call a therapist for cyclists?
A: A cycologist.
Q: How do you greet an OAP on their new bike tires?
A: Congratulations on your re-tire-ment!
Q: Do you know the hardest thing about learning to ride a bike?
A: The road.
Q: What's the difference between a boy scout and a guy fixing bicycle horns?
A: One's motto is ‘be prepared’, the other's is ‘beep repaired’.
Bike Jokes, Puns & Memes
1. It gets more expensive to buy a tire pump every year.
It's all because of inflation.
2. I changed my bike's tires for the last time.
It was time for retirement.
3. My bike chain went rusty. Then my whole bicycle fell apart.
It was a chain reaction.
4. When my bike hurts me, I kick it back.
We're in a vicious cycle.
5. If you ride your bike twice in one day, is that recycling?
6. I was out cycling, and there was a massive tropical storm.
I decided to cyclone.
7. I was selling my bike, and an interested buyer asked what's the lowest I'd go.
About two mph, I said, otherwise you'd tip over.
8. My granny started cycling at 97 years old. She has been doing ten miles per day.
And now we don’t know where the heck she is!
9. If you want to know why the Brits are so good at cycling, then just take a look at the cost of public transport.
10. It's just a hill.
Get over it!
11. I like cyclists who torque the talk.
12. A little boy took his bike to bed.
He didn't want to sleepwalk.
13. There's a little clinic round the corner that does eye checkups mainly for cyclists.
It's called Cycle-Ops.
14. A boxer let the air out of both my wheels.
I had two punc(h)tures.
15. I cycled through a meadow the other day, and my bike looks much prettier.
I've got a daisy chain!
16. My friend is a really good unicycle user but very socially awkward when going out.
She just can't handle bars.
Medium Length Bicycle Jokes
A tandem rider is stopped by a police car. “What've I done, officer?” asks the rider.
“Perhaps you didn't notice, sir, but your wife fell off your bike half a mile back.”
“Oh, I thought I'd gone deaf!”
A cyclist encounter
I was just about to cross the road yesterday when this cyclist knocked me down. He helped me to my feet but then cheekily remarked, “You got lucky, mate.”
I angrily responded, “How is there anything lucky about that?"”
The cyclist replied, “I usually drive a truck.”
A cyclist lying on his deathbed asked his best friend to do him a favour when he'd gone. “Anything,” replied his friend.
“Just don't let my wife sell my bikes for what I told her I paid for them,” he begged.
The vicar and the police
The police stopped a vicar at night for not having a backlight. The vicar says: “I don’t need a backlight; the Lord is with me”.
“Two on a bike as well, that’s another offence,” the policeman replied.
Jack and Jill
“Phew, that was a tough climb,” said Jack. “Thought I was going to bonk“.
“Yeah, good job. I kept the brakes on, or we’d have slid all the way back down!” Jill said.
Biking away from responsibilities
Since things turned sour with my wife a fortnight ago, I've taken to riding 50 miles a day to clear my head. I'm now 700 miles from home and feeling much happier.
Mother-in-law's bike trip
A guy sees his mother in law riding a bicycle. “Where are you going?” he asks.
"To the cemetery," she replies.
"So who's going to return the bike?"
Got my stolen bike back
My bike was stolen last week, and yesterday I saw it on Craigslist. So I messaged the seller, met him at McDonald's, and when I noticed it was 100% my bike, I dumbly asked to take it for a ride.
He said, “Yeah, just don't ride off.” Which is exactly what I did. I stole my bike back.
There are important characteristics that cyclists always share:
- Love for nature and outdoors
- A strong desire for good healthy exercise
- Burn fats, not oils
- A good sense of humour
And we hope we served the last one with a bang! May this compiled list of best cycling jokes will make you lol and take you to places your car never will.
Got any more bicycle jokes, puns and memes you would like to add to this list? Share it with us!
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